Witty Wednesday

Funny Ways to Handle Stress

• Jam 39 tiny marshmallows up your nose and try to sneeze them out.
• Use your mastercard to pay your visa.
• Pop some popcorn without putting the lid on.
• When someone says "Have a nice day" tell them you have other plans.
• Find out what a frog in a blender really looks like.
• Forget the diet and send yourself a candygram.
• Make a list of things that you've already done.
• Dance naked in front of your pets.
• Put your toddlers clothes on backwards and send them off to preschool as if nothing was wrong.
• Retaliate for tax woes by filling out your tax return with roman numerals.
• Tattoo "out to lunch" on your forehead.
• Tape pictures fo your boss on watermelons and lobb them from high places.
• Leaf through National Geographic and draw underwear on the natives.
• Go shopping, buy everything, sweat in it, return it the next day.
• Buy a subscription to sleezoid weekly and set it to your bosses wife/hubby.
• Pay your electricity bill in pennies.
• Drive to work in reverse.
• Relay by mentally reflecting on your favourite episode of The Flintstones during that important finance meeting.
• Refresh yourself. Put your tongue on a cold steel guardrail.
• Tell you boss to blow it out of his mule and let him figure it out.
• Polish your car with earwax.
• Read the dictionary upside down and look for secret messages.
• Start a nasty rumour and see if you recognise it when it comes back to you.
• Bill your doctor/dentist/whoever for time spent in his waiting room.
• Braid the hairs in each nostril.
• Write a short story; using alphabet soup.
• Lie on your back eating celery.... using your naval as a salt dipper.
• Stare at people through the lines of a fork and pretend they're in jail.
• Make up a language and ask people for directions.

To view original article CLICK HERE